Child – Luring Street Smarts for Parents and Kids
I live in a relatively quiet, safe, family friendly town but we’ve certainly had our share of child-luring incidents. This topic can be challenging to teach our kids regardless of their age. On one hand we want to teach our kids to be respectful and polite but on the other, not talk to strangers. It can be a confusing message particularly for younger children. There is also the fine line of instilling a healthy dose of caution versus out and out fear of all things and people. As children get older they like to exert their new independence by getting to and from school without their parents. As a parent, when and how much do we loosen the cords? Knowledge, preparation and communication are probably the key factors for success here.
Talk to your kids at their level about the possible inherent dangers. Use examples from the news. The closer to home the better only because it makes it realistic that luring can happen to them or a friend. Discuss different scenarios (someone asking for directions to needing help or blatantly asking/telling them to get in their car) and allow your child an opportunity to figure out how he/she would respond. But whatever you do, do NOT follow my poor example and flip out when they would respond in a less than ideal manner. Calmly discuss the appropriate actions and responses which may be required in each situation and help them to understand why. Bottom line – tell them to trust their feelings and instincts, and be constantly aware of their surroundings. If they feel uneasy in any way tell them to seek adult help from trusted individuals or homes you have previously agreed upon. If it comes down to it – they should make a huge, loud scene. In particular, shout or yell that the person is NOT their mom, dad etc.
Have an action plan and go through it with them several times if necessary. Walk to and from school with your child to discuss the route they will take. Go over crossing busy roads and encourage the use of crossing guards whenever possible. Discuss “safe places” such as homes of trusted neighbors or friends and potential danger zones such as secluded alleys or roads, busy intersections etc. Review alternate routes and possible shortcuts – are they safe or should they be avoided? Plan walking partners for your child or even form a walking group of several kids that parents can take turns overseeing (like carpooling minus the car). Prepare and discuss contingency plans for various scenarios such as early dismissal days or if your child is unable to walk with the designated friend(s) or has to stay late. Stress that any and ALL deviations from previously discussed and accepted plans are NOT OK unless you have specifically consented for that particular instance.
Lastly, keep the communication doors open so your child feels comfortable coming to you with questions or concerns. Should anything happen to your child or someone they know, you will definitely want them to discuss this with you.
An additional note, our Finds editor, Amy, attended a seminar run by a police detective and his biggest piece of advice was to never have your child walk alone anywhere. If there are two children together it takes the risk of being abducted almost down to zero. The detective said the number one target of children abductions are boys ages 8-14. He also added that you should have a code word for your child if something were to happen to you and someone else needs to pick them up. This way if a stranger says your mom was injured you have to come with me they know not to get in the car unless the driver knows the code word.
For more great information on getting to and from school safely, please click here.
