I Knew I was Falling for You…When You Literally Fell for Me.

I admit it. I love seeing people fall. Or trip. Or slip. I mean, as long as it doesn’t cause any serious bodily harm. And it can happen to anyone…and has–politicians, celebrities! There’s something funny about seeing someone who is completely composed and confident suddenly taken by surprise, they losing their footing…and falling. It’s even funnier when it happens to someone who holds a position of power like a president. I’m a sucker for slapstick. Slapstick is defined as physical comedy based around pratfalls and mild comic violence. What does this say about me?!

I have tripped on Broadway due one wobbly heel. No one stopped to help.

People that know me well know I enjoy seeing a good fall. When my brother and I were both living in Brooklyn, he would make a point to spontaneously and unexpectedly trip, slip, slide or flip for me. No one can fall like him. He’s falls like a noodle hitting a warm plate. It’s sort of a slithering fall that turns his body limp.

I love laughing at my own falls too. One of my funniest falling incidents involved a banana peel. I literally slipped and fell on a banana peel like a cartoon character. I was with my friend Mike who held in a muffled laugh as he stared at me waiting for my reaction. As soon as the shock on my face dissipated and the corners of my mouth turned up into a smile, he fell down beside me burst out laughing too.

I fell for my husband when he shared his dramatic story of falling in the bathtub. He was taking a shower in a clawfoot tub with a wrap-around shower curtain when he stepped on a piece of soap and suddenly lost his footing. He grabbed onthe shower curtain to pull himself up and instead pulled the entire curtain down as he toppled head first out of the tub slipping underneath the sink. As he lay face down butt in the hair on tile, he had that New York thought that anyone that has lived alone has: “Oh my God, what if I would’ve hit my head and bled to death on this very floor. No one would have found me until the stench from my corpse leaked into the hallway.” He caught his breath, stood up, regained his composure, reattached the shower curtain and gingerly stepped naked back into the tub…only to repeat the entire incident and end up, once again, toppling out of the tub and bringing the shower curtain down again. By the end of the story, I knew he was the guy for me.

Husband, if you’re reading this, next time I’m pissed at you or you’re in the doghouse, really all you have to do is (carefully) fall down a flight of stairs or slip on a wet bathroom tile, and you’ll win my heart back.

A few of my favorite falls:
• I fell and broke my wrist at a roller rink when I was standing still. I wasn’t even rollerskating! I was 12 and trying to look cool so I struck a pose against the rail and my feet went out from under me.

• While one of my friend’s husbands was working in their attic, she heard a bang. When she came up stairs, she discovered his legs dangling from the ceiling. He literally fell through the ceiling.

• When I was skiing with my sister in law, I got a little cocky at the end of the day and decided to save time by skiing down a run of solid ice appropriately called “Tourist Trap.” I made it about 3 feet and then fell, tumbled and went face first all the way down the hill. Add snow and pretend Chris Farley is a girl, and my fall looked a little like this video below…